Total Health Work

The New York Times reported recently that several studies on the mental and emotional health of people struggling with depression indicate that much of their unhappiness may be caused by perfectionism.  While they acknowledge that wanting to be good at something is usually a positive trait, when this desire is taken to an extreme it can lead to a number of mental and emotional problems.

Ironically, many of these people are PROUD of being a perfectionist in spite of the fact that it may be the root cause of their struggle with depression.

Much of their unhappiness, according to researchers, stems from their unrealistic expectations, both for themselves and others around them.  When their standards are not met, it eventually leads to emotional conflict.  This, in turn, leads to a sense of being dissatisfied and unhappy.

With today’s obsession with success and being the "best" at everything, it’s no wonder that this is affecting our nation’s health.  Not everyone can be the best at anything all the time (or even most of the time).

It sounds to me that it’s better all around to just chill out.  Learning to go with the flow of things instead of demanding that things always go your way or that you always have to be the best is not just an easier way to live, it’s a healthier way to live.

One source that a lot of people are finding helpful is a book called Changing Your Emotions.  You may want to check it out if you’re one who tends to struggle every now and then with getting rid of negative feelings.

So if you’re unhappy, you may want to ask yourself if it’s just because you’re not getting your way.  If that’s the case, let go of your expectations and allow whatever is happening to just "be." 

You might want to follow the British with their humorous encouragement to "Do you worst."  At least it takes the pressure off. 

In the meantime, be cool and stay healthy.